Advice Needed for Custody Exchange Safety Concerns

I’m currently in a heated custody battle with my ex in Colorado. Our custody exchanges take place at a public location with cameras, as I fear for my safety due to past issues. A few months ago, this arrangement became court-ordered after my ex accused me of molesting our children to manipulate the final orders hearing. DHS and the police ruled the accusation as unfounded.

Recently, I’ve noticed a suspicious car during the last two exchanges. It’s a white Subaru with dark windows. The first time, the car was already parked when I arrived, so I didn’t think much of it. However, during the most recent exchange, I arrived 10 minutes early, and the same car pulled in a few minutes before my ex arrived. The car parked directly behind me, and as soon as I had both kids, it left. It didn’t seem to belong to anyone at the store near the exchange.

This makes me extremely uneasy, as I’ve heard stories about ambushes during custody exchanges. Early in the custody battle, I had another unsettling experience with a truck that sped into an empty parking lot and parked very close to me. I left that time because of how uneasy it made me feel.

I previously requested that exchanges be done at the police department for safety reasons, but the court rejected it, saying it could give the children a negative association with police. I strongly disagree with this reasoning.

I’m debating my next steps:

  • Should I contact the police and ask them to review the cameras from the exchange location?
  • Should I try to gather more information during the next exchange?

I don’t want to confront my ex, as I expect she would deny any involvement. I’m genuinely concerned about the potential risks to my safety and am trying to handle this situation cautiously. Any advice on how to proceed would be appreciated.

You might consider contacting the local police and filing a report about the suspicious vehicle. Providing them with the dates and times of the incidents could help them review surveillance footage. If the court won’t approve exchanges at a police station, you could ask for a security guard to oversee the exchange instead.

Trust your gut. Take note of any details you can about the car next time—like the make, model, and any stickers or unique features. Having someone accompany you to exchanges could also deter any potential threats.

Even if you can’t get the plate, the cameras might have captured it. I’d definitely ask the business to save footage from the time of the exchange. Having a friend or relative present at exchanges could help you feel more secure.