So, I’m dealing with a messy military divorce situation. My spouse is in the Army, and she’s completely ghosted me. She’s in Kentucky, but I don’t know which base, and no one answers when I call. To make things worse, she had a child with someone else while we were married. She’s still getting spousal benefits, and I’m not even sure where to start to resolve all this. Anyone been through this and can share tips?
That sounds rough. Have you tried reaching out to the DEERS office? They can help with locating someone in the military.
Remy said:
That sounds rough. Have you tried reaching out to the DEERS office? They can help with locating someone in the military.
What’s DEERS? I’ve heard the name but don’t really know what they do.
Remy said:
That sounds rough. Have you tried reaching out to the DEERS office? They can help with locating someone in the military.
It’s the Defense Enrollment Eligibility Reporting System. They handle records for service members and dependents. Try visiting their office if calling doesn’t work.
Remy said:
That sounds rough. Have you tried reaching out to the DEERS office? They can help with locating someone in the military.
Oh, okay, thanks. I’ll check that out. Do I need any specific info to get help from them?
Remy said:
That sounds rough. Have you tried reaching out to the DEERS office? They can help with locating someone in the military.
You’ll probably need her full name and Social Security number or service number. If you have her rank and job details, that helps too.
Adultery is actually a crime in the military. You could try contacting the chaplain or legal assistance office on base for guidance.
Ira said:
Adultery is actually a crime in the military. You could try contacting the chaplain or legal assistance office on base for guidance.
Yeah, I heard about that. But how do I even reach her chain of command if I don’t know it?
Ira said:
Adultery is actually a crime in the military. You could try contacting the chaplain or legal assistance office on base for guidance.
If she’s AWOL, the chain of command might already be aware. You could also try legal assistance—they might have advice on contacting her unit.
Ira said:
Adultery is actually a crime in the military. You could try contacting the chaplain or legal assistance office on base for guidance.
Got it. I’ll add that to my list. Do you think I’d need to show up at the base at some point?
Ira said:
Adultery is actually a crime in the military. You could try contacting the chaplain or legal assistance office on base for guidance.
If you have a base ID, you could go to the DEERS office or legal assistance in person. Might get faster results that way.
Have you tried contacting her base directly? Sometimes it helps to be persistent and keep calling.
Finnian said:
Have you tried contacting her base directly? Sometimes it helps to be persistent and keep calling.
I’ve called the general numbers, but no one ever answers. Any tips for getting through?
Finnian said:
Have you tried contacting her base directly? Sometimes it helps to be persistent and keep calling.
Try during business hours, and if that fails, ask for the legal assistance or chaplain’s office specifically.
Finnian said:
Have you tried contacting her base directly? Sometimes it helps to be persistent and keep calling.
Good idea. I’ll try again tomorrow. Thanks!
Sounds like a mess. Have you checked if you’re entitled to anything beyond Tricare? Like spousal support?
BrianMorris said:
Sounds like a mess. Have you checked if you’re entitled to anything beyond Tricare? Like spousal support?
I haven’t gotten anything except Tricare. How would I check if I’m owed more?
BrianMorris said:
Sounds like a mess. Have you checked if you’re entitled to anything beyond Tricare? Like spousal support?
The military has a duty to ensure dependents get support. DEERS or legal assistance could guide you there too.
BrianMorris said:
Sounds like a mess. Have you checked if you’re entitled to anything beyond Tricare? Like spousal support?
Alright, I’ll bring that up when I contact them. Thanks for the heads-up!
Since she’s an E7, her chain of command should be pretty established. Legal assistance can help direct you there.