Hey folks,
I’m currently in the middle of a custody battle, and it’s starting to get really expensive. I was wondering if anyone could share their experiences with how much they’ve spent in similar situations? I know it probably varies depending on the case, but I just want to get a rough idea of what I’m looking at. Any tips or advice on how to keep costs down would be super helpful too. Thanks…
It could be zero if everyone just works together. People let their pride get in the way instead of co-parenting.
Whitney said:
It could be zero if everyone just works together. People let their pride get in the way instead of co-parenting.
That’s ridiculous. The father in my case needs supervision for a reason.
I’m currently $16k in the hole across two countries. I have lawyers who speak seven different languages across three continents. If my ex has his way, we’re headed to The Hague, so I might need a Dutch-speaking lawyer soon.
I paid $12k for a contested child custody case in Maryland. We have two kids. His lawyer convinced him to settle, saying custody wouldn’t change. I ended up with primary custody, joint decision-making, and an increase in child support.
For me, it has been anywhere from $5k to $100k.
Vesper said:
For me, it has been anywhere from $5k to $100k.
Are you talking about what your clients paid? Surely you don’t mean you personally paid that much in legal fees. You’re talking about what you earned, right?
@Parker
Yes, that’s what I earned.
We had two court cases about eight years apart, one cost us $50k and the other $30k. In between, there was a case to change the parenting schedule when the child started school and the parents lived on opposite coasts, and another for child support. Both of those were done without lawyers and cost a few hundred dollars.
Those spending over $100k are usually the ones who keep going back to court. If both sides accept the initial court decision and try to communicate instead of dragging things back to court, you can keep the costs in the tens of thousands, not hundreds of thousands. If you’re getting along and just need help with paperwork, you could keep it under $10k. But if you’re on this forum, that’s probably not the case.
@mathewzyller
Wow, you win this thread so far. I should graph these costs, but I’m too tired tonight.
It’s such a sad issue. I bet the US spends more on this kind of law than anywhere else.
At least we don’t live under religious laws outside the court system.
I fought for eight years, and to answer your question, the cost goes until someone runs out of money. I had a panel of lawyers tell me that’s the hard truth. The one with more money will win. In my case, it cost $300,000.
@Wade
How old are your kids?
@Wade
I spent less than $5k, my ex spent over $50k. I have custody, she gets holiday visits. It really depends. I did most of the paperwork and research myself since I have some paralegal training.
JuristJourney said:
@Wade
I spent less than $5k, my ex spent over $50k. I have custody, she gets holiday visits. It really depends. I did most of the paperwork and research myself since I have some paralegal training.
What should I look for when hiring a lawyer? Any tips?
@Laken
Check reviews and talk to anyone you know who has hired similar lawyers. Once you have a shortlist, consult with the top two or three, and hire the one you feel most comfortable with. It’s worth paying for a consultation to get a sense of who’s best.
Lawyers aren’t cheap, but time with your kids is priceless.
Several of the people I’ve worked with have spent over $200k.
Jessie said:
Several of the people I’ve worked with have spent over $200k.
That’s why I spent months learning family law so I could represent myself without spending a fortune.
Jessie said:
Several of the people I’ve worked with have spent over $200k.
That’s why I spent months learning family law so I could represent myself without spending a fortune.
Same here. I was a paralegal and a mental health professional (because of the issues the father of my kids had - he was also in mental health).
Over the last 10 years, we’ve spent about $60k, and that doesn’t include the initial divorce and custody case.
My ex keeps making up false claims, so we keep a lawyer on retainer.
Reagan said:
Over the last 10 years, we’ve spent about $60k, and that doesn’t include the initial divorce and custody case.
My ex keeps making up false claims, so we keep a lawyer on retainer.
How old are your kids?