Hey everyone, I really need some advice. My husband is a combat veteran recently diagnosed with PTSD, and I’m struggling. He’s been mentally abusive, gaslighting me, and withholding finances. My daughter and I feel neglected, but he seems fine to everyone else. He locks me out of accounts, spreads lies, and even blocks me for days. I’ve been a housewife until this year, so I’m unsure where to turn. The VA says they can’t help me unless he’s there, which he’s not consistent about. What should I do? Has anyone else dealt with this?
Wow, that sounds really tough. Have you looked into local resources for spouses of veterans? Some groups might help even if the VA won’t.
Haven said:
Wow, that sounds really tough. Have you looked into local resources for spouses of veterans? Some groups might help even if the VA won’t.
I haven’t yet. Do you know of any specific groups? I feel like I’m hitting a wall with the VA.
Haven said:
Wow, that sounds really tough. Have you looked into local resources for spouses of veterans? Some groups might help even if the VA won’t.
Check out the Military and Family Support Centers or community-based nonprofits. They’re usually helpful for situations like this.
If he’s 70% disabled, aren’t there programs for dependents? Maybe financial aid or counseling for families?
Denny said:
If he’s 70% disabled, aren’t there programs for dependents? Maybe financial aid or counseling for families?
I asked the VA, but they keep saying I need him to be present. It’s so frustrating.
Denny said:
If he’s 70% disabled, aren’t there programs for dependents? Maybe financial aid or counseling for families?
Yeah, the VA can be tricky. Try documenting everything and maybe look for legal advice too. Some lawyers do pro bono work for veterans’ families.
What about counseling for you and your daughter? Even if he won’t go, you can still find support.
Luca said:
What about counseling for you and your daughter? Even if he won’t go, you can still find support.
Good idea. Any recommendations for where to start?
Luca said:
What about counseling for you and your daughter? Even if he won’t go, you can still find support.
Start with local shelters or family advocacy groups. Some offer free counseling for abuse victims.
I’m so sorry you’re going through this. Have you thought about reaching out to a lawyer about the financial stuff?
Ren said:
I’m so sorry you’re going through this. Have you thought about reaching out to a lawyer about the financial stuff?
Not yet. I’m worried it’ll make things worse, but I feel like I have no other option.
Ren said:
I’m so sorry you’re going through this. Have you thought about reaching out to a lawyer about the financial stuff?
Even just a consultation might help. Some lawyers specialize in military families and can guide you without escalating things.
What’s gaslighting? I see it mentioned a lot but IDK what it actually means.
Keir said:
What’s gaslighting? I see it mentioned a lot but IDK what it actually means.
It’s when someone manipulates you into doubting yourself or your reality. Like, he denies things I’ve seen happen.
Keir said:
What’s gaslighting? I see it mentioned a lot but IDK what it actually means.
Yup, it’s super toxic. It makes you question your sanity. So sorry you’re dealing with that.