What do you do when the dependency court ignores the law and due process?

Seeking Legal Advice
1

I’m in a tough spot where the court backed up false claims (made by the other parent) of abuse against me and my partner, even though my child quickly admitted that those claims were not true. Instead of looking into this, Child Protective Services (CPS) said I made my child change their story. Even though I gave a lot of proof that the claims were false, CPS and the court ignored everything.

Right now, I’m only allowed limited supervised visits with my child, and it feels like it’s all based on lies. What’s worse is that the family court won’t even look at the evidence I’ve submitted, and they’re telling me I need to admit that the abuse claims are true. They’ve basically given me a choice: leave my partner or risk losing visitation altogether. This is completely opposite to what my child’s therapist has said in their letter. The therapist said they didn’t see any manipulative behavior and that my relationship with my child is healthy and good for their well-being. They even recommended more unsupervised visits based on how well our visits have gone.

I feel like I’m stuck in an impossible situation where I’m being forced to admit to something I didn’t do just to keep seeing my child.

What can I do to challenge the court’s disregard for due process, my therapist’s recommendations, and the evidence I’ve provided? How can I fight a system that seems to be set on keeping me from having a real relationship with my child?

2

I feel like there’s more to this story. Why is CPS or the court telling you to leave your partner or lose visitation? It’s hard to believe the court would make a decision like that unless they thought your partner was a threat to your child.

3

Jay said:
I feel like there’s more to this story. Why is CPS or the court telling you to leave your partner or lose visitation? It’s hard to believe the court would make a decision like that unless they thought your partner was a threat to your child.

The court orders didn’t mention anything about my partner. In fact, they technically allowed for more time with my child. The therapist’s schedule limited how much time I could actually use. Now, my visitation has been formally reduced as the hearings continue. What’s confusing is that the therapist clearly said I’m not a risk to my child, but the court still made the same decision.

My partner isn’t even mentioned in the court papers, so I don’t know why the judge is pushing this issue. It’s inconsistent. Either the judge trusts the therapist, who he ordered, or he doesn’t. If he didn’t trust the therapist, I’d think they’d only allow supervised visits anyway.

I think they’re suggesting my partner is a threat because the false abuse claims involved him or me. It’s unclear. The whole thing was messy. They railroaded us. Now the judge wants to act like the abuse claims are true, even with new evidence of parental alienation. The judge says not accepting the claims is bad for me, but the claims aren’t true! I don’t know what to do.

4

Joss said:

Jay said:
I feel like there’s more to this story. Why is CPS or the court telling you to leave your partner or lose visitation? It’s hard to believe the court would make a decision like that unless they thought your partner was a threat to your child.

The court orders didn’t mention anything about my partner. In fact, they technically allowed for more time with my child. The therapist’s schedule limited how much time I could actually use. Now, my visitation has been formally reduced as the hearings continue. What’s confusing is that the therapist clearly said I’m not a risk to my child, but the court still made the same decision.

My partner isn’t even mentioned in the court papers, so I don’t know why the judge is pushing this issue. It’s inconsistent. Either the judge trusts the therapist, who he ordered, or he doesn’t. If he didn’t trust the therapist, I’d think they’d only allow supervised visits anyway.

I think they’re suggesting my partner is a threat because the false abuse claims involved him or me. It’s unclear. The whole thing was messy. They railroaded us. Now the judge wants to act like the abuse claims are true, even with new evidence of parental alienation. The judge says not accepting the claims is bad for me, but the claims aren’t true! I don’t know what to do.

Did the judge directly tell you to leave your partner? Did your lawyer talk to the judge before the trial and mention this? Were there drugs involved in your past or with your partner? Trying to figure out why the court is focusing on your partner unless they think there’s some risk to your child. Does your partner have a criminal record?

5

Jay said:

Joss said:
Jay said:
I feel like there’s more to this story. Why is CPS or the court telling you to leave your partner or lose visitation? It’s hard to believe the court would make a decision like that unless they thought your partner was a threat to your child.

The court orders didn’t mention anything about my partner. In fact, they technically allowed for more time with my child. The therapist’s schedule limited how much time I could actually use. Now, my visitation has been formally reduced as the hearings continue. What’s confusing is that the therapist clearly said I’m not a risk to my child, but the court still made the same decision.

My partner isn’t even mentioned in the court papers, so I don’t know why the judge is pushing this issue. It’s inconsistent. Either the judge trusts the therapist, who he ordered, or he doesn’t. If he didn’t trust the therapist, I’d think they’d only allow supervised visits anyway.

I think they’re suggesting my partner is a threat because the false abuse claims involved him or me. It’s unclear. The whole thing was messy. They railroaded us. Now the judge wants to act like the abuse claims are true, even with new evidence of parental alienation. The judge says not accepting the claims is bad for me, but the claims aren’t true! I don’t know what to do.

Did the judge directly tell you to leave your partner? Did your lawyer talk to the judge before the trial and mention this? Were there drugs involved in your past or with your partner? Trying to figure out why the court is focusing on your partner unless they think there’s some risk to your child. Does your partner have a criminal record?

None of that is the case. The claims said I let my partner harm my child. But during testimony, my child admitted they lied to the police and that no abuse happened. Despite this, my lawyer didn’t show important evidence to back me up, so I was at a disadvantage.

The dependency judge didn’t tell me directly to leave my partner. The family court judge mentioned it, but there’s no formal order saying I must leave the relationship. It’s just implied that my relationship is a concern, even though there’s no real evidence of that.

As for pre-trial talks between my lawyer and the judge, I don’t know of any that said I needed to leave my partner. If they happened, I wasn’t told.

Neither my partner nor I have any history of drug use, and there’s no criminal record. There’s no reason the court should view him as a danger.

This is what I can’t figure out. The judge keeps focusing on my partner even though there’s no clear evidence. My child already said there was no abuse, but the court is treating this like there’s still a danger. I think it’s because the dependency court accepted the false claims, and now the family court is stuck on that. I don’t know how to fix this, as the judge won’t look at the new evidence. And it’s not like the evidence is weak—it’s clear and solid.

6

Joss said:

Jay said:
Joss said:
Jay said:
I feel like there’s more to this story. Why is CPS or the court telling you to leave your partner or lose visitation? It’s hard to believe the court would make a decision like that unless they thought your partner was a threat to your child.

The court orders didn’t mention anything about my partner. In fact, they technically allowed for more time with my child. The therapist’s schedule limited how much time I could actually use. Now, my visitation has been formally reduced as the hearings continue. What’s confusing is that the therapist clearly said I’m not a risk to my child, but the court still made the same decision.

My partner isn’t even mentioned in the court papers, so I don’t know why the judge is pushing this issue. It’s inconsistent. Either the judge trusts the therapist, who he ordered, or he doesn’t. If he didn’t trust the therapist, I’d think they’d only allow supervised visits anyway.

I think they’re suggesting my partner is a threat because the false abuse claims involved him or me. It’s unclear. The whole thing was messy. They railroaded us. Now the judge wants to act like the abuse claims are true, even with new evidence of parental alienation. The judge says not accepting the claims is bad for me, but the claims aren’t true! I don’t know what to do.

Did the judge directly tell you to leave your partner? Did your lawyer talk to the judge before the trial and mention this? Were there drugs involved in your past or with your partner? Trying to figure out why the court is focusing on your partner unless they think there’s some risk to your child. Does your partner have a criminal record?

None of that is the case. The claims said I let my partner harm my child. But during testimony, my child admitted they lied to the police and that no abuse happened. Despite this, my lawyer didn’t show important evidence to back me up, so I was at a disadvantage.

The dependency judge didn’t tell me directly to leave my partner. The family court judge mentioned it, but there’s no formal order saying I must leave the relationship. It’s just implied that my relationship is a concern, even though there’s no real evidence of that.

As for pre-trial talks between my lawyer and the judge, I don’t know of any that said I needed to leave my partner. If they happened, I wasn’t told.

Neither my partner nor I have any history of drug use, and there’s no criminal record. There’s no reason the court should view him as a danger.

This is what I can’t figure out. The judge keeps focusing on my partner even though there’s no clear evidence. My child already said there was no abuse, but the court is treating this like there’s still a danger. I think it’s because the dependency court accepted the false claims, and now the family court is stuck on that. I don’t know how to fix this, as the judge won’t look at the new evidence. And it’s not like the evidence is weak—it’s clear and solid.

What exactly were the claims against your partner? Did they say your partner hit your child? Yelled at them? Did something inappropriate? How old is your child?

7

If I were in your situation, I would do whatever the court says to rebuild my relationship with my child.

8

Always put your kid first. I know this situation is tough, but your child’s needs come first. Have you talked to your lawyer about this?

9

It might not seem fair, but it looks like you have a choice to make between your partner and your child. Make the right decision.

10

Do you have a lawyer? What kind of hearings have taken place so far? Was there an emergency custody hearing? Are you on a court-ordered case plan?

11

Bao said:
Do you have a lawyer? What kind of hearings have taken place so far? Was there an emergency custody hearing? Are you on a court-ordered case plan?

I didn’t have a good lawyer. In my dependency case, my attorney didn’t cross-examine any key witnesses or present my evidence. They only questioned my child, and they did it poorly. After that, they closed the case without really defending me, so I didn’t get a fair trial.

I appealed and wrote my own petition claiming I had bad legal help, but the court denied it and assumed my lawyer had a strategy, which they didn’t.

Now I’m in family court. I’ve shown that things have changed and even brought a letter from the therapist and proof of parental alienation, but the judge won’t look at any of it. It feels like my efforts are being ignored, and I’m stuck without a fair chance to resolve this.

12

Joss said:
I’m in a tough spot where the court backed up false claims (made by the other parent) of abuse against me and my partner, even though my child quickly admitted that those claims were not true. Instead of looking into this, Child Protective Services (CPS) said I made my child change their story. Even though I gave a lot of proof that the claims were false, CPS and the court ignored everything.

Right now, I’m only allowed limited supervised visits with my child, and it feels like it’s all based on lies. What’s worse is that the family court won’t even look at the evidence I’ve submitted, and they’re telling me I need to admit that the abuse claims are true. They’ve basically given me a choice: leave my partner or risk losing visitation altogether. This is completely opposite to what my child’s therapist has said in their letter. The therapist said they didn’t see any manipulative behavior and that my relationship with my child is healthy and good for their well-being. They even recommended more unsupervised visits based on how well our visits have gone.

I feel like I’m stuck in an impossible situation where I’m being forced to admit to something I didn’t do just to keep seeing my child.

What can I do to challenge the court’s disregard for due process, my therapist’s recommendations, and the evidence I’ve provided? How can I fight a system that seems to be set on keeping me from having a real relationship with my child?

At the end of the day, you’re going to have to choose between your child and your partner. I’ve seen people who didn’t leave their partner and lost custody for almost 2 years. They thought it was unfair, just like you do. But it wasn’t.

13

Joss said:

Joss said:
I’m in a tough spot where the court backed up false claims (made by the other parent) of abuse against me and my partner, even though my child quickly admitted that those claims were not true. Instead of looking into this, Child Protective Services (CPS) said I made my child change their story. Even though I gave a lot of proof that the claims were false, CPS and the court ignored everything.

Right now, I’m only allowed limited supervised visits with my child, and it feels like it’s all based on lies. What’s worse is that the family court won’t even look at the evidence I’ve submitted, and they’re telling me I need to admit that the abuse claims are true. They’ve basically given me a choice: leave my partner or risk losing visitation altogether. This is completely opposite to what my child’s therapist has said in their letter. The therapist said they didn’t see any manipulative behavior and that my relationship with my child is healthy and good for their well-being. They even recommended more unsupervised visits based on how well our visits have gone.

I feel like I’m stuck in an impossible situation where I’m being forced to admit to something I didn’t do just to keep seeing my child.

What can I do to challenge the court’s disregard for due process, my therapist’s recommendations, and the evidence I’ve provided? How can I fight a system that seems to be set on keeping me from having a real relationship with my child?

At the end of the day, you’re going to have to choose between your child and your partner. I’ve seen people who didn’t leave their partner and lost custody for almost 2 years. They thought it was unfair, just like you do. But it wasn’t.

That would only make sense if the allegations weren’t false.

14

Briar said:

Joss said:
Joss said:
I’m in a tough spot where the court backed up false claims (made by the other parent) of abuse against me and my partner, even though my child quickly admitted that those claims were not true. Instead of looking into this, Child Protective Services (CPS) said I made my child change their story. Even though I gave a lot of proof that the claims were false, CPS and the court ignored everything.

Right now, I’m only allowed limited supervised visits with my child, and it feels like it’s all based on lies. What’s worse is that the family court won’t even look at the evidence I’ve submitted, and they’re telling me I need to admit that the abuse claims are true. They’ve basically given me a choice: leave my partner or risk losing visitation altogether. This is completely opposite to what my child’s therapist has said in their letter. The therapist said they didn’t see any manipulative behavior and that my relationship with my child is healthy and good for their well-being. They even recommended more unsupervised visits based on how well our visits have gone.

I feel like I’m stuck in an impossible situation where I’m being forced to admit to something I didn’t do just to keep seeing my child.

What can I do to challenge the court’s disregard for due process, my therapist’s recommendations, and the evidence I’ve provided? How can I fight a system that seems to be set on keeping me from having a real relationship with my child?

At the end of the day, you’re going to have to choose between your child and your partner. I’ve seen people who didn’t leave their partner and lost custody for almost 2 years. They thought it was unfair, just like you do. But it wasn’t.

That would only make sense if the allegations weren’t false.

I had a lot of proof, even from their own investigators, showing that the child’s father was coaching them. I also had records and documents supporting it. But the court chose to ignore all of it.

15

Joss said:
I’m in a tough spot where the court backed up false claims (made by the other parent) of abuse against me and my partner, even though my child quickly admitted that those claims were not true. Instead of looking into this, Child Protective Services (CPS) said I made my child change their story. Even though I gave a lot of proof that the claims were false, CPS and the court ignored everything.

Right now, I’m only allowed limited supervised visits with my child, and it feels like it’s all based on lies. What’s worse is that the family court won’t even look at the evidence I’ve submitted, and they’re telling me I need to admit that the abuse claims are true. They’ve basically given me a choice: leave my partner or risk losing visitation altogether. This is completely opposite to what my child’s therapist has said in their letter. The therapist said they didn’t see any manipulative behavior and that my relationship with my child is healthy and good for their well-being. They even recommended more unsupervised visits based on how well our visits have gone.

I feel like I’m stuck in an impossible situation where I’m being forced to admit to something I didn’t do just to keep seeing my child.

What can I do to challenge the court’s disregard for due process, my therapist’s recommendations, and the evidence I’ve provided? How can I fight a system that seems to be set on keeping me from having a real relationship with my child?

The court isn’t trying to keep you from having a relationship with your child. They’ve just decided on how it should happen, and it seems different from what you want.

The court has the authority to make these decisions. I know this is hard, but you have to find a way to follow the court’s orders while you figure things out.

Can your partner move out for now? Do you have options for housing during your visits? Are there parenting classes you or your partner could take? The court might have concerns you can address.

If you don’t have a lawyer, get one. This is a long process. It will take time and effort. Instead of fighting the court, focus on what’s best for your child. Courts don’t want to get things wrong, and nothing is final. Keep working to prove your case and don’t give up. Good luck.

16

Oak said:

Joss said:
I’m in a tough spot where the court backed up false claims (made by the other parent) of abuse against me and my partner, even though my child quickly admitted that those claims were not true. Instead of looking into this, Child Protective Services (CPS) said I made my child change their story. Even though I gave a lot of proof that the claims were false, CPS and the court ignored everything.

Right now, I’m only allowed limited supervised visits with my child, and it feels like it’s all based on lies. What’s worse is that the family court won’t even look at the evidence I’ve submitted, and they’re telling me I need to admit that the abuse claims are true. They’ve basically given me a choice: leave my partner or risk losing visitation altogether. This is completely opposite to what my child’s therapist has said in their letter. The therapist said they didn’t see any manipulative behavior and that my relationship with my child is healthy and good for their well-being. They even recommended more unsupervised visits based on how well our visits have gone.

I feel like I’m stuck in an impossible situation where I’m being forced to admit to something I didn’t do just to keep seeing my child.

What can I do to challenge the court’s disregard for due process, my therapist’s recommendations, and the evidence I’ve provided? How can I fight a system that seems to be set on keeping me from having a real relationship with my child?

The court isn’t trying to keep you from having a relationship with your child. They’ve just decided on how it should happen, and it seems different from what you want.

The court has the authority to make these decisions. I know this is hard, but you have to find a way to follow the court’s orders while you figure things out.

Can your partner move out for now? Do you have options for housing during your visits? Are there parenting classes you or your partner could take? The court might have concerns you can address.

If you don’t have a lawyer, get one. This is a long process. It will take time and effort. Instead of fighting the court, focus on what’s best for your child. Courts don’t want to get things wrong, and nothing is final. Keep working to prove your case and don’t give up. Good luck.

I appreciate your advice. I get that the court has power here, but I’m frustrated because their decisions don’t reflect what’s really going on. I’ve shown evidence of parental alienation and changes in the situation, but the court just won’t consider it.

I’m trying to follow the court’s orders and also work through the issues raised. It’s not just about doing what the court says—it’s about making sure what’s best for my child actually happens. I’ve already taken a parenting class and am now certified to teach them too. I’ll think about housing options during visitation.

You’re right, I need a lawyer, but I’ve spent so much on bad ones during the dependency case that I’m hesitant. I know this is a process that takes time, and I’m committed to doing whatever it takes to create a healthy environment for my child.

17

Oak said:

Joss said:
I’m in a tough spot where the court backed up false claims (made by the other parent) of abuse against me and my partner, even though my child quickly admitted that those claims were not true. Instead of looking into this, Child Protective Services (CPS) said I made my child change their story. Even though I gave a lot of proof that the claims were false, CPS and the court ignored everything.

Right now, I’m only allowed limited supervised visits with my child, and it feels like it’s all based on lies. What’s worse is that the family court won’t even look at the evidence I’ve submitted, and they’re telling me I need to admit that the abuse claims are true. They’ve basically given me a choice: leave my partner or risk losing visitation altogether. This is completely opposite to what my child’s therapist has said in their letter. The therapist said they didn’t see any manipulative behavior and that my relationship with my child is healthy and good for their well-being. They even recommended more unsupervised visits based on how well our visits have gone.

I feel like I’m stuck in an impossible situation where I’m being forced to admit to something I didn’t do just to keep seeing my child.

What can I do to challenge the court’s disregard for due process, my therapist’s recommendations, and the evidence I’ve provided? How can I fight a system that seems to be set on keeping me from having a real relationship with my child?

The court isn’t trying to keep you from having a relationship with your child. They’ve just decided on how it should happen, and it seems different from what you want.

The court has the authority to make these decisions. I know this is hard, but you have to find a way to follow the court’s orders while you figure things out.

Can your partner move out for now? Do you have options for housing during your visits? Are there parenting classes you or your partner could take? The court might have concerns you can address.

If you don’t have a lawyer, get one. This is a long process. It will take time and effort. Instead of fighting the court, focus on what’s best for your child. Courts don’t want to get things wrong, and nothing is final. Keep working to prove your case and don’t give up. Good luck.

I totally agree with this. Here’s another important thing: Forget about the courts for a moment. Focus on being the best parent you can be with the time you have.

I only have 30% custody of my kids because of lies my ex told during our divorce. It sucks. But even with less time, I’m still raising my kids. I make sure I teach them what they need to know. I’m not giving up just because the situation is hard.

My goal is for my kids to look back when they’re older and say I was a great dad. If you keep that goal in mind, you’ll get through this no matter what happens in court.

18

Zeph said:

Oak said:
Joss said:
I’m in a tough spot where the court backed up false claims (made by the other parent) of abuse against me and my partner, even though my child quickly admitted that those claims were not true. Instead of looking into this, Child Protective Services (CPS) said I made my child change their story. Even though I gave a lot of proof that the claims were false, CPS and the court ignored everything.

Right now, I’m only allowed limited supervised visits with my child, and it feels like it’s all based on lies. What’s worse is that the family court won’t even look at the evidence I’ve submitted, and they’re telling me I need to admit that the abuse claims are true. They’ve basically given me a choice: leave my partner or risk losing visitation altogether. This is completely opposite to what my child’s therapist has said in their letter. The therapist said they didn’t see any manipulative behavior and that my relationship with my child is healthy and good for their well-being. They even recommended more unsupervised visits based on how well our visits have gone.

I feel like I’m stuck in an impossible situation where I’m being forced to admit to something I didn’t do just to keep seeing my child.

What can I do to challenge the court’s disregard for due process, my therapist’s recommendations, and the evidence I’ve provided? How can I fight a system that seems to be set on keeping me from having a real relationship with my child?

The court isn’t trying to keep you from having a relationship with your child. They’ve just decided on how it should happen, and it seems different from what you want.

The court has the authority to make these decisions. I know this is hard, but you have to find a way to follow the court’s orders while you figure things out.

Can your partner move out for now? Do you have options for housing during your visits? Are there parenting classes you or your partner could take? The court might have concerns you can address.

If you don’t have a lawyer, get one. This is a long process. It will take time and effort. Instead of fighting the court, focus on what’s best for your child. Courts don’t want to get things wrong, and nothing is final. Keep working to prove your case and don’t give up. Good luck.

I totally agree with this. Here’s another important thing: Forget about the courts for a moment. Focus on being the best parent you can be with the time you have.

I only have 30% custody of my kids because of lies my ex told during our divorce. It sucks. But even with less time, I’m still raising my kids. I make sure I teach them what they need to know. I’m not giving up just because the situation is hard.

My goal is for my kids to look back when they’re older and say I was a great dad. If you keep that goal in mind, you’ll get through this no matter what happens in court.

That’s great advice. I’m doing my best to keep that mindset too.

19

Joss said:
I’m in a tough spot where the court backed up false claims (made by the other parent) of abuse against me and my partner, even though my child quickly admitted that those claims were not true. Instead of looking into this, Child Protective Services (CPS) said I made my child change their story. Even though I gave a lot of proof that the claims were false, CPS and the court ignored everything.

Right now, I’m only allowed limited supervised visits with my child, and it feels like it’s all based on lies. What’s worse is that the family court won’t even look at the evidence I’ve submitted, and they’re telling me I need to admit that the abuse claims are true. They’ve basically given me a choice: leave my partner or risk losing visitation altogether. This is completely opposite to what my child’s therapist has said in their letter. The therapist said they didn’t see any manipulative behavior and that my relationship with my child is healthy and good for their well-being. They even recommended more unsupervised visits based on how well our visits have gone.

I feel like I’m stuck in an impossible situation where I’m being forced to admit to something I didn’t do just to keep seeing my child.

What can I do to challenge the court’s disregard for due process, my therapist’s recommendations, and the evidence I’ve provided? How can I fight a system that seems to be set on keeping me from having a real relationship with my child?

You need a lawyer to file those motions for you.

But while you’re sorting that out, you have to follow the court orders exactly as they say.

If everything you’ve said is true, it’s going to take time to change the current orders. Think about leaving your partner, at least for now, so you don’t lose access to your child while you fight this in court.