Hi, I’m a father to a girl who was born earlier this year. The mother has refused to let me see our child, aside from a few pictures, videos, and rare FaceTime calls. I filed a petition in court to adjudicate parentage and also a motion for genetic testing since she has refused to cooperate with establishing paternity, something we agreed upon before our child’s birth.
This is the first child for both of us, and I’m wondering what to expect on the day of the first court hearing for genetic testing. I’m a bit nervous. Will I be waiting outside the courtroom until my scheduled time? What happens once I’m inside? Are there other people with their cases who will be called up before me? How do they call the names?
It wasn’t hard figuring out what and how to file with the district clerk, but not knowing what to expect during the actual hearing is making me uneasy, especially since I’m representing myself (pro se) without an attorney.
I know going to court can be nerve-wracking, especially when you’re handling it all on your own. I’ve got some advice that should help ease some of your concerns.
Yes, you’ll likely wait outside the courtroom until your case is called. Courtrooms are usually busy, so don’t be surprised if there are other people waiting for their cases to be heard. The judge or a court clerk will call your name when it’s time, and you’ll head in.
Once you’re inside, the hearing will be pretty straightforward since it’s about genetic testing. The judge will ask you and the mother some questions to clarify the details of your filing and probably confirm if both parties agree to the testing. This hearing is more about getting the process started rather than making any significant decisions.
There will likely be about 20 cases on the docket. For me, they handled the cases with lawyers first, then Zoom calls. You just sit there and listen until they call your name, which can take a while. Once they call your names, you go to the table, and they ask you questions. Our case only took about 10 minutes, and we got paperwork a couple of weeks later.
Make sure to dress appropriately for court. Address the judge as ‘Your Honor’ and only present provable facts. Don’t hide any income, and take notes (I recommend a yellow legal pad and multiple pens). Focus on what she says, especially regarding income, morals, or anything else that could affect custody or support. Never lose your temper or interrupt anyone, even if something is untrue. Look at the judge, not her, while speaking. Good luck.
Arrive early, be respectful to the judge, and dress appropriately. The judge will not appreciate anyone showing up in flip-flops or dressing inappropriately. Bring all the evidence you have—screenshots of conversations where she refused to allow you to see your child or take a DNA test. Has she been served with the petition? If she hasn’t been served or hasn’t responded, the hearing may get postponed. Stay calm and composed, especially if she says something upsetting. Your focus at this hearing should be to get the DNA test ordered, as you won’t get visitation until paternity is established. Concentrate on that.
Hang in there. Judges are often more understanding of self-represented litigants. It’s good that you acted quickly once you realized she wasn’t going to honor your agreement. If you haven’t already, start pursuing parenting time. A child support case will likely be opened soon as well.
@Jamie
Stick to the facts, answer the questions directly, and avoid rambling. When you present evidence, give a one-line summary for each piece of evidence and pause—let the judge ask for more details or documentation if needed.
You’ll wait outside the courtroom until your name is called, similar to how a typical hearing works. Honestly, the paperwork is the easy part, but you might want to consider getting an attorney to help guide you through the process.
@Kieran
In my area, family court operates more like a ‘cattle call.’ The judge will call up cases one by one, often in order of complexity. Your hearing will likely be short, just establishing paternity. Be ready with your financial data and a proposed custody plan for any future hearings regarding custody or child support.