Will Sexual Harassment charges do anything to this girl or just make things worse?

I met this girl on a site called FetLife and we fucked about 3 times. We both agreed for it to be a casual thing and the way she talked to me makes that obvious. But now that I’ve cut it off she keeps sending screenshots of my nudes to my family members. It’s been over the course of about 6 months now she’s sent some to my mom, some to my brother. We were anonymous when we were fucking but I guess she found my Facebook. I blocked her on there but she’s probably got another account that I won’t even know the name of. I just want this to end. But she’s so crazy that I think she might try to lie on me if I send the cops to her place.

Feel trapped. Please help.

That’s revenge porn. And it’s illegal in most states I think.

Sidney said:
That’s revenge porn. And it’s illegal in most states I think.

Yes. OP, please contact the police about this. She’s committing a really serious crime here. Be sure to save all of your communications with her in case she is unstable enough to make a false accusation like you fear. It could be very vital to your defense since it would almost certainly be able to be used to show that she is lying, but that’s a separate point from her illegal actions she’s doing right now.

You are describing revenge porn, not sexual harassment.

Revenge porn is a crime in most places, and you can report it to the police.

Zinn said:
You are describing revenge porn, not sexual harassment.

Revenge porn is a crime in most places, and you can report it to the police.

Revenge porn is a form of sexual harassment. In this instance, she’s sexually harassing his relatives too.

@Keir
Sexual harassment is a feature of employment and education law; it’s not criminal and not relevant here.

Criminal harassment is what most people would refer to as ‘stalking’; it may have a sexual element, but it’s not necessary.

Sending nude pictures without the consent of the recipient may be illegal on its own in some jurisdictions, but that is less common than laws against sending nude pictures without the consent of the subject of the photo.

Absolutely report this. Even if she lies, there’s blatant evidence of what she’s doing, which is a crime. Keep records of any interactions, take screenshots of any conversations you’ve had, even if you think they’re irrelevant, just in case you need them. I’m so sorry you’re going through this; I hope you get your justice.

Sexual harassment falls under civil law and applies to workplace settings. It isn’t a criminal offense. This isn’t sexual harassment. Depending on location, it might be something else.

Like others have said, that is revenge porn, and it’s illegal in many jurisdictions. It may also escalate to criminal harassment/stalking and may need a protection order for. It may even be domestic abuse (dependent on jurisdiction statutes). Screenshot all instances of this for evidence to turn into the police. Start the paper trail so she can’t come back with false allegations that distort the narrative in her favor. You may even want to talk with support/customer service at FetLife about this illegal behavior (especially if she’s sending members’ profile pictures to folks outside the site) and they might be able to shut down her accounts. If you have any sort of actual damages (lost jobs/lost wages for time off to deal with this, costs of filing legal docs, proven medical diagnosis caused by this abhorrent behavior) file a lawsuit or small claims. You may not be able to get all damages paid back (can’t squeeze blood from a stone); however, you may be granted garnishment of her wages/tax returns, and you can put liens on her property (house/car) dependent on jurisdiction. That might wake her up and stop the nonsense. Nip this in the bud now before it gets out of hand. You don’t need a warrant issued for your arrest for a false report of rape, and as well, a 98lb-5ft-nothing woman with a hunting knife/freedom seed high velocity dispenser is just as dangerous as a 6’9’ 350-pound gym rat dude with Xmas hams for fists. You may want to start carrying OC spray just in case; there’s a little more leniency in its use than other methods of self-defense. May the gods watch over ya and keep your boots on a good path.

A lesson about sharing nudes in a new relationship.

Which nudes? That you sent her, or from your FL?
You gave one to her; you gave the other to the world. Laws in your state may differentiate.

Skyler said:

Skyler said:

Skyler said:

Skyler said:

I’ve tried to let it blow over for the last 6 months and she keeps doing it. There will be a lull for a couple of months, and then she gives me a panic attack by sending my stuff to family members. There’s probably family that has gotten it that I don’t even know of.

@Ezri
Have you contacted her to tell her that if she does not stop you will get the police involved? And maybe you can link her to the statute she is violating. I’d probably try this route before contacting the police because she could make this very difficult if she claims you assaulted her at some point, which depending on what you all were doing sexually could get difficult to defend.

If you have any concerns about physical safety, I’d probably go directly to the police without warning her.

Another risk of warning her that you might go to police is that she might go to them first and preempt any account you give.

Good luck getting her out of your life once and for all.