I’m 17 years old and currently living with my dad and stepmom (they’re not married). Recently, my stepmom threatened to kick me out and send me back to live with my biological mom. I’m really concerned about this situation.
To give you some background, my biological mother lost custody of me and my brother due to drug use and neglect when I was almost 8 years old. I moved in with my dad and stepmom shortly after that, and for a while, everything was fine.
I’m worried about what my stepmom said. Does she have the right to do this? Can she really make me move back with my biological mom, especially given the circumstances of my past? I’d appreciate any advice or insights from anyone who might have been in a similar situation.
First off, this woman is not your stepmom since your dad and her aren’t married. She has no legal claim to anything. Just call her your dad’s girlfriend because that’s all she is. She can’t tell you who you can talk to or forbid you from reaching out to your mom. You’re 17, not 5! Call your mom whenever you want, and if you feel like living with her, go for it—you’re almost 18 anyway.
Also, it’s a good idea to start thinking about your future. Are you planning to go to college? What do you want to do after high school?
Next time she assaults you CALL 911. Call your mother and ask to visit her. That will give you a view of whether or not it would be a good idea to move in with her. Ts crazy no one is protecting you.
Your dad’s girlfriend (not your stepmom) has no legal rights over you. She can’t kick you out or put her hands on you. As someone who’s been in both roles as a stepmom and a biological mom, that really makes me sick. You should definitely give your bio mom a call. You’re so close to turning 18…
And about the dad’s girlfriend “making her daughter watch while she hit us” wtffff that is soooo creepy. I’m a mom and I read these stories and just wish I could go hug all these kids. Wtf
She aint your stepmom. If your grandparents own the house, what kind of arrangement do they have with your dad and his girlfriend? If you have that kind of relationship with your grandparents, they could potentially kick her out for abusing you and your brother. Also, why can’t you respond to your mom?
Record the yelling and any beatings, and then, if you want to, reach out to your mom. I doubt most judges would deny her some sort of say, especially if she can prove she’s clean with random drug tests and you can show that your current household is unsafe. Honestly, make her life hell—call the cops with that recording of her abusing you and ask to prosecute for assault. Get CPS involved too. It’s time to go nuclear since your dad aint helping you…
I would try to mend your relationship with your brother and see if he’d be okay with you staying with him as a backup until you turn 18. He’d only need to help you for a limited time in the next seven months, which isn’t too much to ask. That way, you’d have two emergency places to stay, including your friend’s family.
Since you haven’t talked to your mom in nine years, it might not be realistic to rely on her as a safety net, especially with only seven months until you turn 18. It wouldn’t hurt to reconnect and see what her situation is, but maybe keep her as a third option for now.
Also, consider freezing your credit reports. I’ve seen too many cases where family members take out credit cards illegally and rack up debt in someone else’s name. Better to be safe…
