Co Parent keeping my child away from me

Family Law Forum Child Custody
21

Reed said:

Hale said:
Reed said:
I’m not really sure what to do here.

Basically, I have a 2-year-old daughter with my ex. We were on semi-good terms, and I was seeing my daughter pretty regularly until mid-July when she suddenly decided I couldn’t see her without a custody agreement in place.

So, I did what I had to do. At the end of July, I filed the paperwork, including a request for temporary relief. In early August, she was served via substitute service since she wouldn’t answer the door. The papers were handed to her boyfriend, and I also mailed a second copy directly to her.

She never responded to the court, and after the 31-day period passed, I filed for default. This week, the court signed off on the judgment, and I was notified that the custody and visitation order was granted. I called the court to confirm everything.

Today was supposed to be the first day I could see my daughter under the new agreement. I texted her on Thursday to let her know the judgment had passed and that I’d be coming on Saturday. I texted her again today to confirm. Now she’s claiming she filed a motion to quash the service, saying I didn’t serve her correctly, and because of that, she doesn’t have to follow the court order. If she did file anything, it would’ve been yesterday, well past the 31-day window.

Can she even do this? From what I understand, even if she filed to appeal, the temporary order would still stand until a hearing. I’m going to the courthouse on Monday to file for enforcement and check if she’s really filed anything. I’m just looking for advice or if there’s anything else I should know in the meantime.

You should file a petition for the violation and suggest doing exchanges at a neutral location, like a police station. Do you have a lawyer?

When I texted her earlier about the exchange, I suggested meeting in a public place. I’m not represented by a lawyer right now because I can’t afford one. I’m looking into legal aid. I was hoping to avoid a hearing, but I’ve been documenting everything just in case.

After you talk to her, follow up with an email to confirm everything. Something like:

‘Ex,
Thank you for talking with me today. We confirmed the pickup time will be ___. I suggested that we meet at ____. You said ___. Let me know if I misunderstood anything.’

22

Reed said:
I’m not really sure what to do here.

Basically, I have a 2-year-old daughter with my ex. We were on semi-good terms, and I was seeing my daughter pretty regularly until mid-July when she suddenly decided I couldn’t see her without a custody agreement in place.

So, I did what I had to do. At the end of July, I filed the paperwork, including a request for temporary relief. In early August, she was served via substitute service since she wouldn’t answer the door. The papers were handed to her boyfriend, and I also mailed a second copy directly to her.

She never responded to the court, and after the 31-day period passed, I filed for default. This week, the court signed off on the judgment, and I was notified that the custody and visitation order was granted. I called the court to confirm everything.

Today was supposed to be the first day I could see my daughter under the new agreement. I texted her on Thursday to let her know the judgment had passed and that I’d be coming on Saturday. I texted her again today to confirm. Now she’s claiming she filed a motion to quash the service, saying I didn’t serve her correctly, and because of that, she doesn’t have to follow the court order. If she did file anything, it would’ve been yesterday, well past the 31-day window.

Can she even do this? From what I understand, even if she filed to appeal, the temporary order would still stand until a hearing. I’m going to the courthouse on Monday to file for enforcement and check if she’s really filed anything. I’m just looking for advice or if there’s anything else I should know in the meantime.

It sounds like parental alienation. Here’s some advice on how to handle it:

1. Document Everything

Keep detailed records of every interaction with your ex. Include dates, times, and what was said, especially when she denies visits.

2. Focus on Your Child’s Best Interests

Frame everything around what’s best for your daughter. Alienation is harmful to her well-being, and courts don’t look kindly on it.

3. Consider Involving a Guardian ad Litem

A GAL can investigate your case from your child’s perspective, which could be helpful in proving your case.

4. File for Contempt

You already have a court order. If she keeps violating it, file for contempt. The court will step in.

5. Stay Calm and Present

Keep a consistent presence in your daughter’s life, even if it’s just through phone calls or letters.

6. Be Professional

Stay composed and professional in court. Don’t give her any ammunition to use against you.

It’s important to show the court you’re the parent better suited to providing a stable, loving environment for your child.

23

Wynn said:

Reed said:
I’m not really sure what to do here.

Basically, I have a 2-year-old daughter with my ex. We were on semi-good terms, and I was seeing my daughter pretty regularly until mid-July when she suddenly decided I couldn’t see her without a custody agreement in place.

So, I did what I had to do. At the end of July, I filed the paperwork, including a request for temporary relief. In early August, she was served via substitute service since she wouldn’t answer the door. The papers were handed to her boyfriend, and I also mailed a second copy directly to her.

She never responded to the court, and after the 31-day period passed, I filed for default. This week, the court signed off on the judgment, and I was notified that the custody and visitation order was granted. I called the court to confirm everything.

Today was supposed to be the first day I could see my daughter under the new agreement. I texted her on Thursday to let her know the judgment had passed and that I’d be coming on Saturday. I texted her again today to confirm. Now she’s claiming she filed a motion to quash the service, saying I didn’t serve her correctly, and because of that, she doesn’t have to follow the court order. If she did file anything, it would’ve been yesterday, well past the 31-day window.

Can she even do this? From what I understand, even if she filed to appeal, the temporary order would still stand until a hearing. I’m going to the courthouse on Monday to file for enforcement and check if she’s really filed anything. I’m just looking for advice or if there’s anything else I should know in the meantime.

It sounds like parental alienation. Here’s some advice on how to handle it:

1. Document Everything

Keep detailed records of every interaction with your ex. Include dates, times, and what was said, especially when she denies visits.

2. Focus on Your Child’s Best Interests

Frame everything around what’s best for your daughter. Alienation is harmful to her well-being, and courts don’t look kindly on it.

3. Consider Involving a Guardian ad Litem

A GAL can investigate your case from your child’s perspective, which could be helpful in proving your case.

4. File for Contempt

You already have a court order. If she keeps violating it, file for contempt. The court will step in.

5. Stay Calm and Present

Keep a consistent presence in your daughter’s life, even if it’s just through phone calls or letters.

6. Be Professional

Stay composed and professional in court. Don’t give her any ammunition to use against you.

It’s important to show the court you’re the parent better suited to providing a stable, loving environment for your child.

Thanks. When she first started denying me access, she offered video calls but kept trying to control when and where I could call from. I stopped contacting her after I filed the papers. I’m worried that will look bad in court, but if I called, she’d just keep contacting me too. I hope her actions will backfire because I can’t afford much beyond legal aid.

24

Reed said:
I’m not really sure what to do here.

Basically, I have a 2-year-old daughter with my ex. We were on semi-good terms, and I was seeing my daughter pretty regularly until mid-July when she suddenly decided I couldn’t see her without a custody agreement in place.

So, I did what I had to do. At the end of July, I filed the paperwork, including a request for temporary relief. In early August, she was served via substitute service since she wouldn’t answer the door. The papers were handed to her boyfriend, and I also mailed a second copy directly to her.

She never responded to the court, and after the 31-day period passed, I filed for default. This week, the court signed off on the judgment, and I was notified that the custody and visitation order was granted. I called the court to confirm everything.

Today was supposed to be the first day I could see my daughter under the new agreement. I texted her on Thursday to let her know the judgment had passed and that I’d be coming on Saturday. I texted her again today to confirm. Now she’s claiming she filed a motion to quash the service, saying I didn’t serve her correctly, and because of that, she doesn’t have to follow the court order. If she did file anything, it would’ve been yesterday, well past the 31-day window.

Can she even do this? From what I understand, even if she filed to appeal, the temporary order would still stand until a hearing. I’m going to the courthouse on Monday to file for enforcement and check if she’s really filed anything. I’m just looking for advice or if there’s anything else I should know in the meantime.

It sounds like she’s just trying to delay things. The 31-day deadline is solid, and substitute service is valid, especially if she refused to accept the papers in person. Even if she filed something, the temporary order stands until a hearing is set. You’re doing the right thing by going to the courthouse and filing for enforcement. Keep calm, document everything, and let her scramble to catch up.

25

Wynn said:

Reed said:
I’m not really sure what to do here.

Basically, I have a 2-year-old daughter with my ex. We were on semi-good terms, and I was seeing my daughter pretty regularly until mid-July when she suddenly decided I couldn’t see her without a custody agreement in place.

So, I did what I had to do. At the end of July, I filed the paperwork, including a request for temporary relief. In early August, she was served via substitute service since she wouldn’t answer the door. The papers were handed to her boyfriend, and I also mailed a second copy directly to her.

She never responded to the court, and after the 31-day period passed, I filed for default. This week, the court signed off on the judgment, and I was notified that the custody and visitation order was granted. I called the court to confirm everything.

Today was supposed to be the first day I could see my daughter under the new agreement. I texted her on Thursday to let her know the judgment had passed and that I’d be coming on Saturday. I texted her again today to confirm. Now she’s claiming she filed a motion to quash the service, saying I didn’t serve her correctly, and because of that, she doesn’t have to follow the court order. If she did file anything, it would’ve been yesterday, well past the 31-day window.

Can she even do this? From what I understand, even if she filed to appeal, the temporary order would still stand until a hearing. I’m going to the courthouse on Monday to file for enforcement and check if she’s really filed anything. I’m just looking for advice or if there’s anything else I should know in the meantime.

It sounds like she’s just trying to delay things. The 31-day deadline is solid, and substitute service is valid, especially if she refused to accept the papers in person. Even if she filed something, the temporary order stands until a hearing is set. You’re doing the right thing by going to the courthouse and filing for enforcement. Keep calm, document everything, and let her scramble to catch up.

Document everything. Save all text messages where you tried to enforce the court order, and don’t rely on phone calls—stick to written communication like texts or emails.

Even make a calendar to show the judge a quick overview of what happened when. Judges like organized facts.

26

Kendall said:

Wynn said:
Reed said:
I’m not really sure what to do here.

Basically, I have a 2-year-old daughter with my ex. We were on semi-good terms, and I was seeing my daughter pretty regularly until mid-July when she suddenly decided I couldn’t see her without a custody agreement in place.

So, I did what I had to do. At the end of July, I filed the paperwork, including a request for temporary relief. In early August, she was served via substitute service since she wouldn’t answer the door. The papers were handed to her boyfriend, and I also mailed a second copy directly to her.

She never responded to the court, and after the 31-day period passed, I filed for default. This week, the court signed off on the judgment, and I was notified that the custody and visitation order was granted. I called the court to confirm everything.

Today was supposed to be the first day I could see my daughter under the new agreement. I texted her on Thursday to let her know the judgment had passed and that I’d be coming on Saturday. I texted her again today to confirm. Now she’s claiming she filed a motion to quash the service, saying I didn’t serve her correctly, and because of that, she doesn’t have to follow the court order. If she did file anything, it would’ve been yesterday, well past the 31-day window.

Can she even do this? From what I understand, even if she filed to appeal, the temporary order would still stand until a hearing. I’m going to the courthouse on Monday to file for enforcement and check if she’s really filed anything. I’m just looking for advice or if there’s anything else I should know in the meantime.

It sounds like she’s just trying to delay things. The 31-day deadline is solid, and substitute service is valid, especially if she refused to accept the papers in person. Even if she filed something, the temporary order stands until a hearing is set. You’re doing the right thing by going to the courthouse and filing for enforcement. Keep calm, document everything, and let her scramble to catch up.

Document everything. Save all text messages where you tried to enforce the court order, and don’t rely on phone calls—stick to written communication like texts or emails.

Even make a calendar to show the judge a quick overview of what happened when. Judges like organized facts.

I’ve been keeping screenshots of every time I tried to see my daughter and was refused. Hopefully, this doesn’t turn into a long court battle, but I’m prepared just in case. I’m a bit worried because she’s been the primary caregiver her whole life.

27

Reed said:

Kendall said:
Wynn said:
Reed said:
I’m not really sure what to do here.

Basically, I have a 2-year-old daughter with my ex. We were on semi-good terms, and I was seeing my daughter pretty regularly until mid-July when she suddenly decided I couldn’t see her without a custody agreement in place.

So, I did what I had to do. At the end of July, I filed the paperwork, including a request for temporary relief. In early August, she was served via substitute service since she wouldn’t answer the door. The papers were handed to her boyfriend, and I also mailed a second copy directly to her.

She never responded to the court, and after the 31-day period passed, I filed for default. This week, the court signed off on the judgment, and I was notified that the custody and visitation order was granted. I called the court to confirm everything.

Today was supposed to be the first day I could see my daughter under the new agreement. I texted her on Thursday to let her know the judgment had passed and that I’d be coming on Saturday. I texted her again today to confirm. Now she’s claiming she filed a motion to quash the service, saying I didn’t serve her correctly, and because of that, she doesn’t have to follow the court order. If she did file anything, it would’ve been yesterday, well past the 31-day window.

Can she even do this? From what I understand, even if she filed to appeal, the temporary order would still stand until a hearing. I’m going to the courthouse on Monday to file for enforcement and check if she’s really filed anything. I’m just looking for advice or if there’s anything else I should know in the meantime.

It sounds like she’s just trying to delay things. The 31-day deadline is solid, and substitute service is valid, especially if she refused to accept the papers in person. Even if she filed something, the temporary order stands until a hearing is set. You’re doing the right thing by going to the courthouse and filing for enforcement. Keep calm, document everything, and let her scramble to catch up.

Document everything. Save all text messages where you tried to enforce the court order, and don’t rely on phone calls—stick to written communication like texts or emails.

Even make a calendar to show the judge a quick overview of what happened when. Judges like organized facts.

I’ve been keeping screenshots of every time I tried to see my daughter and was refused. Hopefully, this doesn’t turn into a long court battle, but I’m prepared just in case. I’m a bit worried because she’s been the primary caregiver her whole life.

Don’t turn down video calls with your daughter, even if your ex is being difficult. Just focus on your daughter during the calls and avoid conversations with your ex. Also, follow up with emails summarizing what was said during the calls to document everything.

28

Reed said:

Kendall said:
Wynn said:
Reed said:
I’m not really sure what to do here.

Basically, I have a 2-year-old daughter with my ex. We were on semi-good terms, and I was seeing my daughter pretty regularly until mid-July when she suddenly decided I couldn’t see her without a custody agreement in place.

So, I did what I had to do. At the end of July, I filed the paperwork, including a request for temporary relief. In early August, she was served via substitute service since she wouldn’t answer the door. The papers were handed to her boyfriend, and I also mailed a second copy directly to her.

She never responded to the court, and after the 31-day period passed, I filed for default. This week, the court signed off on the judgment, and I was notified that the custody and visitation order was granted. I called the court to confirm everything.

Today was supposed to be the first day I could see my daughter under the new agreement. I texted her on Thursday to let her know the judgment had passed and that I’d be coming on Saturday. I texted her again today to confirm. Now she’s claiming she filed a motion to quash the service, saying I didn’t serve her correctly, and because of that, she doesn’t have to follow the court order. If she did file anything, it would’ve been yesterday, well past the 31-day window.

Can she even do this? From what I understand, even if she filed to appeal, the temporary order would still stand until a hearing. I’m going to the courthouse on Monday to file for enforcement and check if she’s really filed anything. I’m just looking for advice or if there’s anything else I should know in the meantime.

It sounds like she’s just trying to delay things. The 31-day deadline is solid, and substitute service is valid, especially if she refused to accept the papers in person. Even if she filed something, the temporary order stands until a hearing is set. You’re doing the right thing by going to the courthouse and filing for enforcement. Keep calm, document everything, and let her scramble to catch up.

Document everything. Save all text messages where you tried to enforce the court order, and don’t rely on phone calls—stick to written communication like texts or emails.

Even make a calendar to show the judge a quick overview of what happened when. Judges like organized facts.

I’ve been keeping screenshots of every time I tried to see my daughter and was refused. Hopefully, this doesn’t turn into a long court battle, but I’m prepared just in case. I’m a bit worried because she’s been the primary caregiver her whole life.

The more proof you have, the easier this process will be. If she makes accusations, just stick to the facts.

29

Wynn said:

Reed said:
I’m not really sure what to do here.

Basically, I have a 2-year-old daughter with my ex. We were on semi-good terms, and I was seeing my daughter pretty regularly until mid-July when she suddenly decided I couldn’t see her without a custody agreement in place.

So, I did what I had to do. At the end of July, I filed the paperwork, including a request for temporary relief. In early August, she was served via substitute service since she wouldn’t answer the door. The papers were handed to her boyfriend, and I also mailed a second copy directly to her.

She never responded to the court, and after the 31-day period passed, I filed for default. This week, the court signed off on the judgment, and I was notified that the custody and visitation order was granted. I called the court to confirm everything.

Today was supposed to be the first day I could see my daughter under the new agreement. I texted her on Thursday to let her know the judgment had passed and that I’d be coming on Saturday. I texted her again today to confirm. Now she’s claiming she filed a motion to quash the service, saying I didn’t serve her correctly, and because of that, she doesn’t have to follow the court order. If she did file anything, it would’ve been yesterday, well past the 31-day window.

Can she even do this? From what I understand, even if she filed to appeal, the temporary order would still stand until a hearing. I’m going to the courthouse on Monday to file for enforcement and check if she’s really filed anything. I’m just looking for advice or if there’s anything else I should know in the meantime.

It sounds like she’s just trying to delay things. The 31-day deadline is solid, and substitute service is valid, especially if she refused to accept the papers in person. Even if she filed something, the temporary order stands until a hearing is set. You’re doing the right thing by going to the courthouse and filing for enforcement. Keep calm, document everything, and let her scramble to catch up.

I double-checked, and the second copy of the paperwork was mailed first-class. I also have a video of the server confirming her boyfriend’s identity before handing him the papers. She’s also claiming I lied on the documents but didn’t say how. I’m hoping her nonsense doesn’t help her case.

30

Reed said:
I’m not really sure what to do here.

Basically, I have a 2-year-old daughter with my ex. We were on semi-good terms, and I was seeing my daughter pretty regularly until mid-July when she suddenly decided I couldn’t see her without a custody agreement in place.

So, I did what I had to do. At the end of July, I filed the paperwork, including a request for temporary relief. In early August, she was served via substitute service since she wouldn’t answer the door. The papers were handed to her boyfriend, and I also mailed a second copy directly to her.

She never responded to the court, and after the 31-day period passed, I filed for default. This week, the court signed off on the judgment, and I was notified that the custody and visitation order was granted. I called the court to confirm everything.

Today was supposed to be the first day I could see my daughter under the new agreement. I texted her on Thursday to let her know the judgment had passed and that I’d be coming on Saturday. I texted her again today to confirm. Now she’s claiming she filed a motion to quash the service, saying I didn’t serve her correctly, and because of that, she doesn’t have to follow the court order. If she did file anything, it would’ve been yesterday, well past the 31-day window.

Can she even do this? From what I understand, even if she filed to appeal, the temporary order would still stand until a hearing. I’m going to the courthouse on Monday to file for enforcement and check if she’s really filed anything. I’m just looking for advice or if there’s anything else I should know in the meantime.

Have you checked if she filed anything with the court? If not, you can enforce the order with the police.