Concerns About Ex-BD’s Request for Relocating Our Baby

General Discussions Forum
1

Hi everyone,

I’m reaching out for advice on a situation involving my ex-baby daddy (24M) and our 11-month-old daughter. He made the decision to relocate to Texas in November 2023 to “get himself together and find better opportunities,” and he’s now living there permanently with his mother. I (22F) am still in Louisiana with our baby.

He used to visit every other month, but he hasn’t seen our daughter since May. He’s currently unemployed (hasn’t been since September 2023) and hasn’t been contributing financially. He’s inconsistent with visits and is now asking for our baby to travel across state lines (8 hours) to spend more time with him.

I’ve expressed that I don’t think it’s the right time for our baby to travel that far, but he interprets this as me trying to keep him away from her. We don’t have a formal court-ordered custody agreement; everything has been civil since we split. He plans to come down soon for her birthday and wants our baby to return to Texas with him afterward.

Is there anything I can do about this situation? Any advice on how to handle this, especially if he insists on taking her out of state? :thinking:

2

Hi Gary!
It sounds like a challenging situation, and it’s great that you’re seeking advice.

Here are some steps you can consider:

  1. Establish a Formal Custody Agreement: Without a formal custody agreement, things can get complicated. You might want to consider filing for a custody order in Louisiana, where your daughter has been living. This will legally establish custody and visitation rights, making it easier to manage interstate issues.

  2. Understand Legal Jurisdiction: According to the Uniform Child Custody Jurisdiction and Enforcement Act (UCCJEA), the state where the child has lived for the past six months typically has jurisdiction over custody matters. Since your daughter has been living in Louisiana, this state would likely have jurisdiction.

  3. Communicate Clearly: Try to have an open and honest conversation with your ex about your concerns. Explain why you believe it’s not the right time for your daughter to travel such a long distance. Emphasize that your primary concern is her well-being.

  4. Seek Legal Advice: Consulting with a family law attorney can provide you with specific legal advice tailored to your situation. They can help you understand your rights and options, and assist in filing for custody if needed.

  5. Consider Mediation: If direct communication is challenging, mediation can be a helpful way to resolve disputes. A neutral third party can help both of you come to an agreement that prioritizes your daughter’s best interests.

  6. Document Everything: Keep records of all communications and visits. This documentation can be useful if you need to go to court.

It’s important to prioritize your daughter’s safety and well-being in any decision you make.

If you feel that traveling such a long distance is not in her best interest, it’s okay to stand firm on that.