My 10-year-old daughter came home from her father’s house last week and confided in me about verbal and physical abuse at her father’s home for over a year. She told me her father’s girlfriend has been hitting her and calling her names. My daughter also reported drug use, including marijuana, in the house around the children, and that they allow the 17-year-old to drink and get drunk to the point of blacking out. My daughter has also seen suspicious white powder in baggies with a straw in the bathroom.
She doesn’t want to return to her father’s home. I filed an ex parte motion for custody, but the hearing isn’t for another 20 days. CPS said it doesn’t qualify for an investigation because she is not in immediate danger. I filed a police report, but they said without visible marks on her, there’s little they can do for now. I also filed a TPO against the girlfriend, but I’m not sure it will be served before my daughter is supposed to return to her father. Any advice on what I can do?
In most states, at her age, your daughter should have some say in where she wants to live. Could you try working it out with her father to avoid a court battle?
Ezra said:
In most states, at her age, your daughter should have some say in where she wants to live. Could you try working it out with her father to avoid a court battle?
Unfortunately, it’s impossible to talk to him. If I could, I would have tried that first.
If your child feels unsafe, you have the right to keep her from going until the court hearing. If her father tries to enforce visitation, you can explain the situation to the police, who will likely tell him to take it to court.
Call CPS again, they should be taking this seriously. You may also want to involve a mandated reporter like her pediatrician or school counselor to back up your claims.
Morgan said:
Call CPS again, they should be taking this seriously. You may also want to involve a mandated reporter like her pediatrician or school counselor to back up your claims.
I have already contacted CPS and plan to speak with her school counselor today.
My daughter refused to go to her dad’s house once, and I supported her decision. Eventually, he backed down. It may be worth letting her refuse to go and handling the consequences in court later.
Give her a phone and make sure she knows how to call 911 if needed. Encourage her to document her experiences in a journal. Keep everything recorded and documented for the hearing.