I’m really struggling with a situation and could use some advice. I’ve had primary residential custody of my son unofficially since 2018 and officially since 2021, as ordered by the court. I filed for child support in 2021 when I was awarded custody. I live in Pennsylvania, and I’m active duty military. My ex-wife, who is also prior service, lives in Indiana.
In January 2024, we finally had a hearing in Indiana, where she resides, and the judge ordered her to pay $500 a month in child support. But here we are, 8 months later, and I haven’t received a dime. I’m handling everything through a child support representative in PA, who communicates with Indiana’s child support services, but it feels like nothing is happening. No one seems to be enforcing the payments, and I’m at a loss.
I even tried asking my ex directly through the court-ordered app (Family Wizard), and she retaliated by filing a restraining order against me, claiming I was harassing her. Thankfully, the court dismissed it with prejudice, but it just shows how difficult she’s being.
I’m really struggling financially, especially after having to cover the full $7,000 cost for our child’s braces out of pocket. With only one income and no support from her, it’s getting really tough.
On another note, during the child support hearing, she only provided her current pay stubs and didn’t disclose the extra $4,000 a month she receives from military disability. Is VA disability considered income that could be factored into child support?
Who do I go to for help with enforcing these payments? I’m at my wit’s end.
Sorry for your situation, but check out Apportionment. I’m dealing with something similar with my ex-husband, who claimed he wasn’t getting any VA disability compensation. So, I called the VA hotline and asked how much he got this month. Surprise, surprise—they told me, and even sent me a nice letter confirming exactly how much he’s getting each month.
You can do the same—just call the VA hotline and ask how much she’s receiving in VA disability compensation for this month. They’ll send you a verification letter via email or mail saying something like, “VA confirms XYZ receives $XYZ monthly.”
You can call every month if you want to keep tabs on it. You’ll need her name, DOB, SSN, and branch of service. All the best.
You need to get the VA involved and look into garnishment too. I’m surprised it’s not automatic like it is here in Texas. My orders even say they’ll garnish social security benefits if needed.
Yes, they can be garnished for child support. If the VA decides you’re not providing enough support to your dependents, they’ll apportion your benefits and send the money directly to them. This is separate from child support, so they won’t care if you’re sending money after they’ve already apportioned your benefits. Only they decide when the direct deposits stop and for how long. Plus, if any part of your compensation is in place of retirement pay, it CAN be garnished.
Do you have a garnishment order? First thing you need to do is get your lawyer to file for one. That way, her child support goes straight from her employer to the state and then to you, so you’re not just relying on her to pay.
Yes, it is considered income when dealing with support and other marital payment matters. The only exception is if she lives in an assisted care facility that reduces her VA medical retirement benefits. However, if she fails to declare this income and you can’t provide evidence that she receives it, you, as the custodial parent, have the burden of proving it. If you can’t prove it, it won’t be counted. Regarding collections, you will have to rely on the state to handle the situation with her.