My dad is going to court over custody, and I live with my mom right now. She says it won’t end well for him, but I really want to live with him full-time. I’m 13—does my opinion matter in court? What kind of proof should I send my dad to help his case?
Would pictures of my room help? It’s in the basement, has a lot of mold, and the house has only two bedrooms, but seven people live here (three teens, two adults, and two toddlers).
I don’t want CPS involved because my mom threatened to hurt my dad and grandma if they ever came.
If I do get to live with my dad, will I be able to keep my stuff like my phone, game console, and clothes?
If you feel safe enough, try talking to your mom. Let her know that you’re seriously thinking about reporting the living conditions and that you want to live with your dad but still visit her and help with the younger kids. She won’t like it, but she might realize that fighting it too much could bring more problems for her. Just be prepared—this could make your relationship with her worse for a long time.
Yes, take pictures of your room, the mold, and anything else that shows the poor living conditions. Courts often take the child’s preference into account at your age, so be honest if they ask you where you want to live. Also, please tell a trusted adult—maybe a teacher or counselor—about what your mom said. Threats like that are serious.
You’re worried about CPS, but your mom literally said she would hurt people if they got involved. That’s a huge red flag. You might need to call the police and tell them what’s happening.
Ask your dad if he can request a guardian ad litem (someone who looks out for your best interests in court). If that’s not possible, report what’s happening to a teacher or another adult you trust. If none of that works, send your dad all the proof you can. But it’s up to him to handle things the right way in court and submit everything on time.
You might not have much power right now, but collecting proof is a great start. Also, don’t ignore your mom’s threats—judges take that kind of thing seriously. Stay safe and make sure an adult you trust knows what’s going on.