My ex has been avoiding service for contempt charges. He’s failed to pay spousal support, child support, credit cards, and a car payment. Once the server located him, he quit both his full-time and part-time jobs and lied about his identity to avoid being served. Time ran out, and now an Alias Certificate has been issued. We even hired a private investigator, but we still can’t get him served. Meanwhile, he’s driving a new car and living in a new house.
We’ve already missed the second deadline, and my attorney says we may not get another extension. My parents are covering my legal bills, but this is dragging on, and I’m at my wit’s end. The court system feels so unfair—does he just get away with it because he’s good at hiding? Do I have to give up because I can’t keep up with the legal costs?
Your lawyer should know alternative ways to serve someone. For example, you could use a special bailiff or even serve through the Secretary of State depending on the situation. Look into those options with your attorney.
Where I live, if someone avoids service like this, we ask the court for permission to serve them through a newspaper. It’s worth discussing this option with your lawyer.
Sky said:
Where I live, if someone avoids service like this, we ask the court for permission to serve them through a newspaper. It’s worth discussing this option with your lawyer.
The problem is his attorney won’t accept service on his behalf. It feels like the whole system is just helping him avoid accountability. If my parents weren’t helping me, I’d be homeless by now.
Sky said:
Where I live, if someone avoids service like this, we ask the court for permission to serve them through a newspaper. It’s worth discussing this option with your lawyer.
In Texas, if the other side’s lawyer has made an appearance, you can eServe them. If they refuse, you file for Substituted Service and serve it by posting it on their door. We’ve even tracked people down at church or schools before. Don’t give up!
Talk to your attorney about filing a motion for alternative service. In some states, that lets you serve someone through a newspaper or other methods. If they don’t respond, the court can default them, and you might win the case without their involvement. However, keep in mind, if he doesn’t have income or assets to garnish, there might not be much you can recover. These are important questions to discuss with your attorney.
So he’s supposed to pay spousal support, child support, and car payments? That’s a lot. How do you know he lied about his identity to the server? Also, has he ever made any of these payments?
Wynne said:
So he’s supposed to pay spousal support, child support, and car payments? That’s a lot. How do you know he lied about his identity to the server? Also, has he ever made any of these payments?
He told the process server that he wasn’t the person they were looking for. He’s let two cars get repossessed. He paid support for the first four months and then quit his jobs to avoid responsibility.
Just file a declaration listing all your attempts to serve him. Judges usually approve alternative service in cases like this, and when he doesn’t show up, you can default him at the next hearing. Easy win.
Wynne said: @Carson
Do you know where he lives now? Or his parents’ address? How do you know he’s driving a new car?
We know his address, but he won’t answer the door. His attorney found out about the house purchase, and the new car was spotted during a parenting exchange over Labor Day. This was before contempt charges were filed.
@Carson
You should ask the court to involve law enforcement. Avoiding service can be considered a crime, and the judge might order his arrest until the next court date. It’s a frustrating system, but persistence is key. How far behind is he in child support? If it’s over $5k, many states will revoke licenses or garnish refunds from tax filings. This might sound familiar, but it worked for me after years of dealing with a similar ex.
@Drew
He’s over $20k behind in support and I’ve already spent $8k in legal fees, process servers, and a PI in just four months. Feels like the lawyers are the only ones winning here.