Over the last two years, my nephew has moved in with my elderly father-in-law and isolated him from most of the family. He controls everything, including his finances, and has put him in significant debt. My father-in-law has removed his children from his estate and replaced them with my nephew. I’m more concerned about his well-being because he is frequently left alone, and has fallen a lot—38 times in the past year. If he falls at night, he just stays there until my nephew returns. We tried to intervene, but my father-in-law says he gave my nephew permission to use his credit cards, even though he’s now $50,000 in debt. Has anyone dealt with this?
That sounds really tough. Has your nephew been named his legal guardian or has power of attorney over him?
Corey said:
That sounds really tough. Has your nephew been named his legal guardian or has power of attorney over him?
Not that I know of, but my father-in-law seems to give him control over everything anyway.
Have you noticed any moments where your father-in-law expressed concern about the situation?
Bay said:
Have you noticed any moments where your father-in-law expressed concern about the situation?
Yes, when he found out about the $50k debt on his credit cards, he asked me and my daughter to destroy them and take them away from my nephew. But after a private conversation with him, my father-in-law changed his mind.
@MegWhitgal
It sounds like your nephew has a strong influence over him. You might want to look into legal options for elder financial abuse.
Zaden said:
@MegWhitgal
It sounds like your nephew has a strong influence over him. You might want to look into legal options for elder financial abuse.
We involved the police, but my father-in-law now says he gave him permission to use the cards, so nothing could be done.
If you’re in California, you can file an Elder Financial Abuse Complaint. There are forms available for this.
Paz said:
If you’re in California, you can file an Elder Financial Abuse Complaint. There are forms available for this.
Thanks for the suggestion. I’ll check that out and see what we can do.
You might also want to see if your father-in-law has signed any Power of Attorney forms that could give your nephew control legally.
Remy said:
You might also want to see if your father-in-law has signed any Power of Attorney forms that could give your nephew control legally.
I’m not sure if he has. We don’t have access to that information at the moment.
It’s a tough situation. Even if your father-in-law is saying it’s fine, it might be worth consulting with an attorney about his vulnerability and the debt.
Hollis said:
It’s a tough situation. Even if your father-in-law is saying it’s fine, it might be worth consulting with an attorney about his vulnerability and the debt.
We might have to. The situation just keeps getting worse, and I’m worried about his health too.