In California, we’re both in the military but not married. This is the first baby for both of us.
We were dating until I got pregnant. When I said I wanted to keep the baby, he broke up with me and said he doesn’t want anything to do with our child. His friends think he might change his mind because he’s from the South, but I’m not counting on that.
I’m almost in my third trimester and I’m thinking about whether to put his name on the baby’s birth certificate and ask for child support right away, or to just have full custody until he decides he wants to be involved or I need help with money.
Some questions: In California, especially since we’re both in the military, how is custody decided when a baby is born? He’s already living in another state.
If I’m getting assistance from WIC (a program for mothers and children), will the state automatically ask him for child support?
If there’s evidence of emotional abuse (recorded by the military), will that affect who gets custody in regular court?
If I move out of state, will we still settle things in California courts even though neither of us lives there?
If there’s anything else I should know, please tell me.
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Deciding whether to put the father’s name on the birth certificate is a significant decision with various implications. Here are some points to consider:
Pros of Adding the Father to the Birth Certificate:
- [Legal Acknowledgment: It establishes a legal relationship between the child and the father].
- [Child Support: It can facilitate the process of obtaining child support from the father].
- [Inheritance Rights: The child may have rights to inherit from the father.
- [Healthcare: The child might have the right to be added to the father’s health insurance plan.
Cons of Adding the Father to the Birth Certificate:
- [Custody Rights: If the father’s name is on the birth certificate, he may have grounds to seek custody or visitation rights in the future.
- [Parental Involvement: If you anticipate a lack of involvement or negative influence from the father, having him on the birth certificate could complicate matters).
Regarding your specific questions:
- Custody for Unmarried Military Parents: In California, if parents are unmarried, the mother is presumed to have sole custody until paternity is established or a court order is issued. [Custody is decided based on the child’s best interest, and military service can influence custody arrangements].
- WIC Assistance and Child Support: WIC does not automatically involve child support enforcement. [However, if you seek public assistance, the state may pursue child support from the father to recoup some costs.
- Emotional Abuse Evidence: Evidence of emotional abuse can impact custody decisions. [California law considers the best interest of the child, and a history of abuse could affect custody and visitation rights].
- Moving Out of State: If you move out of state, California remains the child’s home state until the child has lived in another state for six months. [After that, the new state may assume jurisdiction over custody matters.
It’s advisable to consult with a family law attorney who can provide guidance tailored to your situation, especially considering the complexities of military service and interstate custody issues. They can also help you understand the full legal implications of your decisions regarding the birth certificate and custody.
@Barbara If you’re in California and you receive help like WIC or food stamps, it doesn’t automatically mean you’ll have to deal with child support stuff. But if you get cash aid (welfare) or Medi-Cal, then child support might come up. However, if it’s a Medi-Cal case and the mom doesn’t want child support, they might just ask for medical support.
But, remember, just because you’re not asking for child support right away doesn’t mean you won’t ever need it. If you’re struggling to afford basics like WIC, it’s likely you could use some extra support for your child too. From what I’ve seen working with child support, many moms didn’t realize they needed it until later, even if they thought they were doing okay without it. So, if the other parent isn’t helping out financially, they really should be.